Why I want to be touched by His Noodly Appendage

Well it is simple really. I like pirates and would wear a pirate outfit everyday, “yarrrring” and drinking grog. And, of course, there is nothing better than an Italian pirate: eating pasta, sinking ships; stealing booty and keeping away Global Warming. Well this is somewhat similar to what the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster proclaims. The story goes that the world and everything in it, including midgets, was made by the great Flying Spaghetti Monster. That the holy regalia of The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the pirate outfit, and that the decrease in pirates is the direct cause of global warming.

Although these are good reasons to convert, they are not really the true reasons why I would want to become a Pastafarian. I would actually like to convert for two reasons. Firstly they are have a really good sense of humour, they do not take themselves seriously, they do not take religion too seriously, I am not sure that they in fact take anything seriously. If you did not realize that Pastafarianism is a bit of a joke on other religions then you really are a lost cause, and if that humour offends you then you are missing the point. I have to admit that anything with a good sense of humour is fairly enticing, I have the opinion that if you cannot laugh at everything and anything then you are probably about to burst into tears, huddle in a corner rocking back and forth howling for a razor blade.

The second and more serious reason, why I would like to be a Pastafarian, is because of their denial of some Ultimate Truth (like that God loves you or that you will be reincarnated) that you need to believe in. Although it does not say this directly, their aim somewhat implies it. The wanting of people to believe in an/the Ultimate Truth is something that puts me off about most religions, as I struggle to follow any ultimate truth. Pastafarianism can almost be seen as an anti-religion in this light, since it is refusing this main point that most religions want to maintain. I am not trying to claim that religions are bad because they have ultimate truths, or that people who are religious are stupid and cannot think for themselves. In some ways I really wish I was or could be religious, and that I think too much in the wrong type of direction for religion. Therefore something that does not lay a claim on me to believe in something that I find almost impossible to truly believe in I find very appealing. This is since I do not want to make a lie of my life acting like I do believe but actually not fully or truthfully. This, by the way, is something that I have done for a fairly long portion of my life. This was however before I really had the ability to decide for myself what to do, what to follow and how to think for myself. I was just following the “in” crowd, which strangely enough for me at the time was the church going crowd. If you do follow your own choices and path and that leads to religion then I am proud of you, and respect you for it. Just do not expect me to just because you believe it is right or true.

If you do not know much about the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster I would recommend reading up about it (at: http://www.venganza.org/about/open-letter/). Their point, although couched in humour, is quite a valid and interesting one.

R’Amen brothers

Jon